But lately, I've been feeling incredibly drained and exhausted simply at the thought of writing another blog post. It seems so much more overwhelming than it should be. And that's not exactly the feeling I went into the Advent season expecting to have. I had such high hopes. I was gonna write a post on Advent every week! And there was going to be consistent quality content on my blog and it would be AWESOME.
And then week one passed and apparently took my energy and motivation along with it. Even sitting down to revise Yellowtree has felt like a chore, sucking the life out of me versus filling me with life like it normally does
And I don't quite know why that is. I'm still showing up, and I'm still trying my best to write my book each day.
Some days there's a flame.Most days I struggle to even find a spark.
And I'm learning to be okay with that, to accept the more sludgy seasons of life without falling prey to them and the lies they often get me to believe about myself and my writing.
I am good enough. My book is good enough. And writing IS worth it.
Anddd repeat.
I've decided to take a bit of a breather for the rest of Advent. I'm backing off from the blog and trying to make it through several pages of Yellowtree each day without getting worn down. I'm waiting and praying and seeking Jesus in the little things and the small spaces, because lately, it's been awfully hard to find him in the big places and experiences, the thick Study Bibles and church services that often seem to get even louder this time of year.
And somehow, someway, I'm learning that God is still there, even when the bright lights and the flashy MERRY CHRISTMAS signs have been stripped away and the season doesn't seem very holly or jolly anymore.
God is still Emmanuel. And He's still with us, even when it doesn't feel like it. Forever and Always.
Peace and love to you during this Advent season.
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